6 Female Criminals Who Deserve TV Shows

bell

LAURA BELL
Name of show: The Hard-On Detective

Bell was nicknamed “Queen of London Whoredom” during the time she was romping the boys in Victorian England. She was the most expensive hooker in the area and would do wild and crazy stuff for the time period, like suggest a position other than missionary. Sexy!

And then the fun stopped when she got hitched, experienced a religious conversation, and became a revivalist preacher on morality. Yep, the hooker was preaching to people about morals. Piggybacking the success of Sherlock, we’ll pair Bell in her days as a floozy with a nerdier and virgin-ier Sherlock Holmes-type character. Just imagine the boner one-liners: “Sometimes a pipe isn’t just a pipe. Toke on that, Holmes.” Brilliant.