6 Secret Service Agents Who’d Never Sleep With Hookers

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FRANK FARMER | THE BODYGUARD (1992)
Farmer is a former agent in business for himself. He’s rigid, he runs a tight ship, he has an inarguably stupid name, and he probably hasn’t been laid since the Ford administration. Then he takes a job protecting Rachel Marron, a singer-turned-actress who’s quite the handful. The two eventually form a bond and get a little touchy-feely, negating the need for him to pick up pros — or so he might think. In the end, Farmer takes a g*ddamned bullet for Marron, who repays him by … giving him a kiss. 

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DOUG CHESNIC | GUARDING TESS (1994)
Agent Chesnic is a pro’s pro, but even if he wanted to spend a night banging exotic hookers in a foreign land — and since Nic Cage plays Chesnic, that’s extremely plausible — the harpy he’s been assigned to protect wouldn’t allow it. Tess Carlisle, the widow of a former U.S. President, rides Chesnic’s ass by making him fetch her breakfast and do household chores. Things take a turn, however, when she gets kidnapped. But Chesnic, being the sap that he is, saves her anyway.