7 Parenting Tips From The Expendables
Before they all got together to blow stuff up, all of the Expendables badasses played movie dads. Here’s what they taught us about raising kids.
By Matt Christensen
As an Expendable: Trench Mauser – former Expendable, friendly rival
As a movie dad: Harry Tasker, John Matrix, Jack Slater – In True Lies (1994), Commando (1985) and Last Action Hero (1993), Arnie plays some sort of action hero whose kid (or a kid he just happens to hang out with) is thrust into danger.
What we learned: Hire a babysitter.
In all of these movies, Schwarzenegger’s children are napped from under his nose, more or less, while he’s out battling terrorists. With a net worth of more than $400 million, The Austrian Oak could’ve shelled out for a babysitter – the national average price of which is about $10-12 / hour – and at least had someone to call the police while the twerps were getting snatched.