The Most Famous Toilets In Movie History
Hollywood has never given toilets the recognition they deserve for their ongoing contributions to film. So we’re remedying that.
By Matt Christensen
Even if a movie isn’t the kind to have a lot of bathroom humor, it may still may very well feature a scene shot in a bathroom. After all, people spend a fair amount of time there, and they work especially well for fight scenes in action movies because there’s lots of stuff to break and blood looks terrific on white tile. Think about it for a minute, and we’ll bet that you can come up with a few great scenes in movies that feature the facilities — and we’ll bet some match up with our favorites. But if we missed any, let us know in the comments.
JURASSIC PARK (1993)
Tyrannosaurus Rex obviously doesn’t see the “Occupied” sign when, in a fit of genetically engineered rage, he forces his gigantic head into an outhouse, thereby destroying it. This kind of ruins the hiding place chosen by a cowardly lawyer (is there any other kind? Heyo!), who has taken refuge on the can. Rex then has himself a snack on the toilet, but fails to wash his hands afterwards. Gross — but in his defense, washing those hands must be a real pain due to his preposterously short arms.
THE BOONDOCK SAINTS (1999)
When Irish brothers Connor (Sean Patrick Flanery) and Murphy MacManus (Norman Reedus) get in a tiff with some Russian mobsters, the duo end up becoming evil-eradicating servants of God. But first the Russians burst into the MacManus’s apartment, handcuff Connor to the toilet, and lead Murphy away to be shot in a pile of garbage. (Talk about insult to injury.) Lucky for Murphy, the power of Christ compels Connor to rip the bowl from the floor, carry it to the roof, and drop it squarely on the Russian’s dome before taking a leap of several stories onto the other gangster’s back. Slainte!
Even the “Worst Toilet in Scotland” couldn’t stop a Renton (Ewan McGregor) from diving into its bowl filled with heinous sludge to retrieve drugs that he’d accidentally just expelled … his rectum. What’s remarkable is not that Renton is able to fit his entire body into the toilet, but that once there, it actually looks like a pretty nice swimmin’ hole. Apparently they make toilets a little differently in Scotland. And/or Renton was already out of his mind on drugs.
FULL METAL JACKET (1987)
Relentless hazing at the hands of his sadistic drill sergeant (R. Lee Ermey) and nonstop teasing by fellow recruits finally make dopey Private Pyle (Vincent D’Onofrio) snap. So he loads his rifle — there are many others like it, but this one is his — heads into the barracks latrine, blows away the sarge, pops a squat on the can, takes a mouthful of muzzle, and paints the wall with the insides of his skull. It’s hard to watch — for crying out loud, there are no stalls in the latrine!
LETHAL WEAPON 2 (1989)
Cop buddies Martin Riggs (Mel Gibson) and Roger Murtaugh (Danny Glover) endure a lot during the original Lethal Weapon — torture, gunshots, Gary Busey — but then they go and mess with a South African Apartheid-era drug-dealing diplomat in the second movie, and things get really bad. Murtaugh is on the john when he makes the somewhat alarming discovery that it’s rigged with a bomb that’s set to explode when he stands up to get off the can. There is, however, a silver lining: It’s the perfect situation for his catchphrase, “I’m too old for this sh*t!”
(Sadly, all of the legit YouTube uploads have been removed, so you’ll have to settle for a remake by two Irish guys.)