How To Have (Drama-Free)
Sex With An Ex
It really is possible to hook up with an ex without everything going to hell afterwards. How do we know? A very wise woman told us how to do it.
By Robin Hilmantel
Sex with an ex is great in theory — you know what she likes, she knows what you like, and the fact that you’re pretty sure, deep down, that it’s a bad idea makes the experience all the hotter. Awesome! Thing is, it really does (almost) always turn into a disaster; most experts back that up, as does pretty much any person who’s done it. But when the opportunity presents itself, you’re not going to be thinking about that — you’re just going to be psyched to have sex with an ex. And I understand. In fact, I’ll even give you some tips to make it as drama-free as possible.
1. DON’T FORCE IT
There’s a difference between trying to hook up with an old girlfriend after you randomly run into her at a bar, and trying to hook up with an old girlfriend by sending her a text at 3 a.m. that says, “Still up? Wanna hang out? ” Unless you have some arrangement in place, chances are the second option will simply result in you being torn to shreds when she has brunch with her friends the next day. But if you find yourself drunkenly stumbling into the same cab together, it’s fair game. Why? Because that way, she feels more like she’s in control.
2. GET KINKY
Go ahead and pull out those tried-and-true moves you know she’s into. But if there’s anything you never did together that you always wanted to do, this might be the perfect time for it. The fact that there are (in theory) no consequences to what you’re doing should open the both of you up to be more adventurous. And if she says she doesn’t want to dress up in the Daffy Duck costume and grind a stiletto heel into your genitals? Well, big deal — it’s not like she’s your girlfriend.