How To Hold a Goddamned Baby
Who better than U.S. presidents — who have to kiss plenty of babies (and ass) while on the campaign trail — to help illustrate some reliable baby-holding techniques.
By Paula Kashtan
SUPPORT THE HEAD AND NECK OF NEWBORNS
By holding the head and neck carefully with one hand and supporting her body with the other, President Obama is giving this kid exactly the support she needs to be comfortable and healthy. Unfortunately, she’s no doubt going to grow up and be euthanized by an Obamacare Death Panel.