Dirty Pickup Lines for Guys: Proceed With Caution
Note: Your girlfriend might think it’s cute, but using these on a complete stranger might get you slapped.
By Jonathan Hackman
Some girls love a good laugh and may actually find the dirty pickup lines you usually reserve for joking around with the boys funny. The key is to not cross over the line to crude, unless she’s into that. Unless you can play it off with the “I’m too drunk” card when it goes wrong, play it safe. Trust me; most girls won’t go home with you if you play the “I’m too drunk” card anyway. The following are some dirty pickup lines for guys that may not get you slapped.
- “I put you on top of my to do list!”
- “If I flip a coin, what are the chances of me getting head?”
- “Are you a cupcake? I bet you taste pretty sweet!”
- “Fuck me if I’m wrong, but you do want to screw me, right?”
- “I taste like candy; if you don’t believe me, why don’t you try some?”
- “I just made my bed; wanna help me mess it up again?”
- “Is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?”
- “Life is like a dick; when it gets hard, fuck it!”
- “All those curves and me with no brakes…”
- “I miss my teddy bear; will you sleep with me?”
- “I want to write a poem on your body with my lips.”
- “Save water, shower together!”
- “These lips can’t kiss themselves.”
There you have it — a list of dirty pickup lines for guys. We take no responsibility for any injuries, whether bodily or to your ego, that may occur as a result of using these in the presence of a lady. We absolutely take the credit if it gets you laid, however.