Obviously Freddy Krueger can teach us all about slicing and dicing — both human flesh and, we presume, minced cuisine — with his rusty makeshift knife-glove. But did you know, thanks to his GIFs, he can also teach us lessons about how to live our lives more civilized? Yeah, it’s a bit of a stretch, but not as much as you’d think. Plus, we’ve been dying — no pun intended — to use Freddy in something. The last time we can recall a Freddy Krueger post was our 8 Grooming Tips From Hideous Monsters, and he had far more to give than we had room for.
So we rounded up some GIFs and here we are — from how to take care of your skin to getting better rest to taking comfier baths, the Nightmare on Elm Street films had plenty more to offer than blood, guts, and cheesy one-liners.
#1. How neat is it that Freddy knows how to count to four! That said, if he applied some aloe vera lotion — Jack Black’s Industrial Strength Hand Healer ($15 @ Amazon.com) that contains vitamins A and E to his skin, he’d look less grotesque. We’re not sure how it would affect his slicing abilities, but we bet the knife would look more polished before it was plunged into someone’s sternum. Point is, if you have nasty and chapped hands, give this Jack Black lotion a test run.
#2. Dude, forget the bunny ears. With a digital antenna you can get HD channels for free. Try to keep up with the times, Fred. Super-Thin Amplified HDTV Antenna with 50-Mile Range ($25 @ Amazon.com)
#3. No wonder Nancy is having nightmares of a rusty glove clawing her in the … you get the idea. Look at how uncomfortable she looks! The Luxury Spa Bath Pillow ($18 @ Amazon.com) is affordable and basic, but provides way more comfort than that POS she’s putting her head on.