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Thursday, October 21st, 2010 | View Comments

Real-Life Video Game Power-Ups

Video game power-ups are great … when they’re in video games. In real life, it’s often a different story.

By Matt Berical

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles girlsGAME: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

POWER-UP: Eating pizza they find in New York City sewers. Doing so revives the Heroes in a Half Shell when they’re feeling a bit peckish during their martial arts-fueled altercations with Master Shredder’s endless minions of ninjas and assorted genetic freaks.

IN REAL LIFE: More than 8 million people live in New York, and lord knows how many rats live in its sewers (not all of them wizened ninjutsu masters). So the Turtles were eating food covered in the filth of millions of people … and rats … and Trumps. We’re not entirely sure what downing a pepperoni and human waste pizza would do to you in real life, but it would probably involve revolting parasites — and it sure as hell wouldn’t heal wounds inflicted by mutants.


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