Real-Life Video Game Power-Ups

Video game power-ups are great … when they’re in video games. In real life, it’s often a different story.

By Matt Berical

Resident Evil Green HerbsGAME: Resident Evil

POWER-UP: Applying the “Green Herb.” The plant restores health to your character after you’ve been attacked by mutated dogs, zombies, or any of Umbrella Corporation’s other abominations.

IN REAL LIFE: We’re not saying the Green Herb is marijuana … but it’s marijuana. Sure, it can be beneficial in managing pain for a variety of maladies and makes Hot Pockets taste like unicorn loin wrapped in sunshine. But it can also inhibit motor function, cause hallucinations, raise your risk of various diseases, and make you fat because you’re inhaling so many damned Hot Pockets. To be fair, however, there hasn’t been any research on cannabis’s effect on zombie-related wounds … yet.

TAGS: chimps, Michael Jackson, power-ups, Resident Evil, steroids, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, video games