If you feel like you’re newsfeed is full of studies — caffeine is good for you, caffeine will make your heart explode. Smartphones make you dumber, but they also kill your boner, etc. — you’re right. A new study from researchers in California and Finland have found that because there are so many goddamn studies it’s getting harder and harder to keep tabs on relevant info. (Hmmm … maybe they should do a study on what consists of “relevant info”?) Of course, the eggheads had an egghead name for it: attention decay. Nerds.
The safe bet? All scientists should put their brainpower toward something meaningful, like
curing cancer abolishing swamp ass and foot odor. In the meantime, we’ll continue to flood our brains with the evidently useless knowledge of studies, like the one we highlighted above this paragraph about how farts might be able to cure illness. You know what that means, don’t you? More taco nights!