TV Characters We’d Like To See Killed Off
Now that the fall TV season is underway, we have but one wish — that these annoying, stupid, whiny, pointless TV characters hurry up and die.
By Matt Ufford
Few things are as satisfying as an evil or hated TV character dying. If I remember correctly, when Ana Lucia was gunned down on Lost, the following day became an impromptu national holiday, as jubilant couch potatoes dropped their remotes and took to the streets for drunken revelry and spontaneous parades.
Unfortunately, few show writers indulge us with this rare delight, leaving us to dream about which TV characters should die and how painful their death scenes should be. With that in mind, here are seven current characters who could only please audiences from the grave.
Walden Schmidt | Two And a Half Men
Charlie Harper got killed off because Charlie Sheen, the actor who played Harper, couldn’t keep his mitts off of drugs and hookers … and kept failing to show up to work … and publicly trashed the people who ran the show. Sheen’s replacement deserves the same fate: Ashton Kutcher’s Schmidt is a handsome, well-endowed Internet billionaire who’s distraught because a woman left him. He’s so distraught that he attempts suicide by drowning himself, but gives up when the ocean’s too cold. Give me one good reason why such a person should live.