As your son grows into adulthood, communication between you can often become strained. Grown sons may not want to talk about their problems or share their feelings with their parents. But effective communication is a key ingredient in maintaining a strong relationship with your adult son. Here are some tips for better communication with your son as he enters adulthood.
Be Respectful
When speaking to your grown son, respect is the most important factor in having an effective conversation. Respect him as an individual, be mindful of his feelings and opinions, and make sure that you don’t judge him or speak down to him. The more respectful you are, the more likely he will be to open up and communicate honestly with you.
Listen More Than You Talk
It can be difficult for parents to let go of the old dynamic where they were in charge and the child was expected to obey without question. However, if you want to have meaningful conversations with your grown son, it’s important that you listen more than you talk. Ask questions, show genuine interest in what he has to say, avoid giving unsolicited advice unless asked for it, and take his feelings seriously.
Set Boundaries
Having clear boundaries is essential when communicating with any adult—including your own grown son. Be firm but fair when setting limits on what is acceptable behavior during conversations and explain why these boundaries are necessary so that he knows why they are being enforced. Having clear boundaries can help keep conversations constructive and productive rather than contentious and unproductive.
How do you get your grown son to listen to you?
Getting a grown son to listen to you can be difficult, but communication remains the key. It’s important to remember that even though your son is an adult and theoretically able to make his own decisions, it is still your role as a parent to guide him and help him understand his options.
The best way of ensuring your advice is taken on board is by creating an atmosphere of mutual respect in conversation. When discussing an issue, try allowing your son to explain their perspective before offering yours – rather than trying to simply impose it on them.
Reassuring them that you care about their needs and want only the best for them can work wonders in helping your son open up, particularly if they are feeling embarrassed or judged. With patience, consistency and firmness, you should be able to reach a point where they are happy to take on board any advice given constructively.
What are some things you should avoid saying to your grown son?
Let’s take a look at some of the things you should avoid saying to your grown son.
Avoid Criticizing His Choices
It can be hard for parents not to criticize their children’s decisions when they don’t agree with them. However, it is important that you respect your son’s autonomy and allow him to make his own choices without criticism or judgment from you.
If he makes a decision that you don’t agree with, you can express your concern in a non-judgmental way while still allowing him the space to make his own decisions.
Don’t Interfere Too Much With His Life
You may feel compelled to offer advice or interfere when it comes to his professional life, romantic relationships, and other areas of his life; however, as long as he is not in danger, it is important that you allow your son the opportunity to learn and grow independently without interference from you. Even if he makes mistakes along the way, they will help shape and refine who he has become as an adult.
Don’t Compare Him To Other People
Comparing people can be damaging and can lead to feelings of inadequacy or inferiority—the same goes for comparing your son to others in an attempt to motivate him or teach him a lesson.
Instead of pointing out what someone else is doing differently or better than him, focus on what sets him apart from everyone else and celebrate those qualities instead!
What are some things you should never do to your grown son?
As a parent, it is important to know when to let go. Even after your son has grown up and moved out, it is extremely important that you remember he is no longer a child. That being said, there are some things you should never do to him regardless of his age.
These include trying to make decisions on his behalf without consulting him in advance or otherwise not respecting his autonomy; using physical punishments like spankings; verbally abusing him with insults or harsh criticism; prying into his personal life without consent or belittling his dreams and ambitions.
Above all, it is essential that you remember your son deserves the same respect that you would demand for yourself.
Last Words
Ultimately, getting your grown son to listen and take on board your advice is possible with patience and understanding. It’s important that you remember he is an adult now, so try not to impose or criticize his choices without first allowing him the opportunity to explain himself. Encourage a mutual atmosphere of respect in any conversations you have together and be sure not to interfere too much with his life nor compare him to others. Above all else, always show your son the same level of respect that you would demand for yourself!
