You go to the same places over and over again and do the same things without fail. And it’s likely that you talk about the same topics and even fight over the same things too. If you say yes to all these, news flash: you’re in a vanilla relationship.
Vanilla isn’t all that bad, whether it pertains to a relationship, sex, or yes, an ice cream flavor. In fact, it can be comforting and soothing since it’s so familiar. But the lack of variety can get old and boring really fast. According to a study, bored couples have a hard time getting out of their rut. What’s more, if they make an effort to spend time engaging in “exciting” activities, they tended to be lower in quality. However, this doesn’t mean that you’re incapable of improving your relationship. With a little creativity, you can make your vanilla relationship stronger and more intimate, and a lot more fun and exciting for both of you.
Go on Fun Dates Every Once in a While
You’ve probably thought about new things that you want to try with your significant other. But on the last minute, you put it off for the usual movie-and-dinner date combo. That’s a surefire way to be on the road to couple boredom. There is evidence that couples who go on regular date nights are more likely to stay together for a long time. Also, making sure that your date nights are fun can help you see each other in a new light.
You don’t have to completely eschew your movie and dinner dates. But every once in a while, experience something new with your partner. For example, you can go try going to an escape room this month. On the next month, you can visit a museum or art gallery. Doing it this way gradually coaxes you out of your comfort zones so both of you won’t feel uncomfortable on your fun dates. Trying new things also give you lots of new topics to talk about.
Think Vanilla with a Hint of Spice
So you’re not into BDSM and you don’t have any unusual kinks. That’s perfectly fine. In fact, more women say that they love vanilla sex since it feels more intimate and romantic and it feels safe and comforting too. But if you want to add a bit of variety into your sex life–without going full on Fifty Shades of Grey–think of incorporating one fun element at a time. For instance you can try using easy-to-use adult toys such as vibrators during sex. Not a fan of dirty talk? Try praising your partner instead. Tell her that she looks beautiful, that you think she’s really sexy, or that she turns you on so much. Compliments can make a woman feel confident, loved, and very happy.
Take up a New Hobby Together
If you’ve always engaged in separate hobbies, it may be high time to find one that’s fun for both of you. A couple hobby can increase your time together and enhance your relationship satisfaction. Do both of you love spending time in nature? You may enjoy hiking, geocaching, kayaking, or camping as a couple. Perhaps you want to try a new way to get fit? Try wall climbing or ballroom dancing. If you want to revisit your childhood, consider playing with Legos or play board games. Even if you think you don’t have much in common, there are activities out there that will suit both of your tastes and personalities. Talk to your partner to see what you can come up with together.
Having a vanilla relationship can be comforting, but there’s always a way to make a good thing even better. Consider these ideas to enhance your relationship and have fun whenever you spend time together.