Dating apps are great, aren’t they? They’re saved us all so much time. In the past, asking someone if they wanted to go on a date involved leaving the house, seeing someone you liked, and then plucking up the courage to go and speak to them. Once you’d done that, you generally had to buy them a few drinks (plus a few for you to boost the aforementioned courage levels) before you could ask them to go on a date. Apps like Tinder have cut out all the time and money express from that process. You just see someone you like, swipe, and get right into it.
While there are many positives to be said for the convenience of dating apps, there are also some pitfalls we can all fall into. Many dating app users, and men in particular, are guilty of using Tinder (or similar apps) as if they were a game on an online slots website. We all know the best way to go about trying to make a return from UK mobile slots, and it’s about repetition. If you don’t get what you want on your first spin, spin again. If there’s still nothing good, spin again. Using that method while playing online slots, you generally find a winner in the end. Use the method on Tinder, and you’ll eventually get a date. It’s all a numbers game.
Should we view it like that, though? If we deal with every potential match as a number rather than a person, are we missing out on the chance to make a real connection with someone? The answer is almost certainly yes, and that might be down to your profile as much as your demeanor when using the app. Ditch your usual approach and follow the advice we’ve laid out for you below, and you could be enjoying a better quality of date in the near future.
Keep Your Clothes On
When we tell you to keep your clothes on, we don’t just mean it in the context of sending unsolicited naked pictures to people. We don’t know who needs to hear this, but if it’s you, stop it. You shouldn’t be at all surprised to find out that the recipient generally doesn’t appreciate it. Not only should you not be sending unwanted pictures of yourself in your birthday suit, but you also shouldn’t be taking your shirt (or anything else) off for your profile picture. You might look great, but you’re communicating the idea that you’re a narcissist. Beyond that, you’re also suggesting that you’re far more interested in the physical aspect of meeting someone than the mental or emotional side. That’s fine if you’re looking for nothing more than hookups, but if you’d actually like to meet someone you intend to see again, choose a classier photo instead.
Come Up With Better Opening Lines
Look, we know it’s hard to start a conversation on Tinder. That’s why a lot of men prefer Bumble on account of the fact that women have to speak first. If you’re single and trying very hard to mingle, though, chances are you have a Tinder account as well as a Bumble account, and you’re sometimes required to initiate the conversation. Please avoid using cheesy chat up lines. If you’re in doubt, here’s a whole range of them that were so bad that everyone’s laughing at them on the internet. Don’t use a line that doesn’t fit your personality, and don’t be as basic as saying ‘how are you’ either. The best approach is to make a comment that isn’t about the looks of the person you’ve matched with. Say something that’s based on their profile information. It shows them that you’ve taken the time to read it and that you’re as interested in them as a person as much as their appearance.
Take A Second Before You Send A Message
How many times have you matched with someone and received a message from them within thirty seconds? If it made you feel weird, you’re not alone, but have you ever been guilty of doing the same thing to someone else? There is such a thing as ‘too keen,’ and sending someone a message the moment they match with you meets that definition. If the match comes as a result of your swipe, that’s fair enough. If it comes as a result of theirs, leave it a while before you introduce yourself. Diving in straight away implies that you’re logged into the app all the time, you’re probably messaging dozens of people, and you haven’t even looked to see who you’re connecting with. None of those bode well as far as the other person is concerned.
Don’t Chase Responses
People are busy. They have jobs and lives and responsibilities. Sometimes they’ll wander off in the middle of a conversation. Sometimes they’ll leave you on ‘read’ for a while. Sometimes they may never come back at all, who knows? That’s their prerogative, and they have the right to do that. If you sent the last message, it’s on them to reply. If they don’t respond, assume they’re not interested. Sending follow-up messages almost never works. The implication is that you’re either desperate or impatient, and nobody has either of those traits listed as the desired qualities of a potential partner. Even if you think things were going well, take the hint if you don’t get a response and leave it alone.
Proof Read Everything
When we meet someone in the flesh, we have multiple ways of assessing whether they work as a potential partner for us. We can assess how they look, how they talk, how they react to us, and how they behave. We get far more of a hint of someone’s true personality when we meet them face to face than we do through the screen of a phone. All you can go off when you’re chatting to someone through a dating app is their profile pictures (which are probably carefully selected and filtered to make them look as good as possible), and the words they use. That makes your words very important. Spell them correctly. Make sure what you’re about to say is actually what you meant to say. Count to ten and re-confirm that yourself that the message you’re about to send is a good idea. You’re being judged on every word of every message, so make those words good ones.
The overall gist of this article is that if you want the best possible results from your time on Tinder – or anywhere else – you should slow down, think more, and focus on the person in front of you and not just their picture. You can still get dates using the old ‘numbers game’ method, but trust us – you’ll get better dates with better people by giving the whole thing a little more thought.