Dry spells happen to all of us, whether you are in a long-term relationship or single. It’s normal, and yet many of us can feel our confidence take a hit after a long dry spell. It can cause us to become shy and nervous, questioning our self-worth. A dry spell can also damage our confidence, and make us wonder whether the relationship is about to end.
What can you do to not only break the dry spell, but also spice up your sex life? Read on for tips on how to spice up your sex life after a dry spell and regain your confidence.
Speak to Your Partner
First things first, if you have a partner, then you will want to check in with them about the dry spell. You never know, but there may be a reason why you or your partner have encountered a dry spell. The conversation should be light-hearted with no signs of guilting the other person into feeling bad for not being sexually active. Guilting them will only make feelings of resentment worse and this can be damaging to your relationship but also the person’s confidence.
For all you know, your partner may be feeling self-conscious about their appearance. Have you both recently had a baby, for example? Or has one of you started a new job and are therefore too tired and stress? Talking about any anxieties can help the both of you overcome them. You can build a stronger emotional connection while also being able to reignite the sexual spark you two once had.
Return to What You Know
You may want to jump into trying something new, but this can open you up to trying and somewhat failing. While there is nothing wrong with trying something and it not going as planned, you do not want to knock your confidence or the confidence of your partner.
Return to the basics of your sex life and build from there. Not only can the two of you refamiliarize yourselves with each other, but you can also enjoy the emotional connection that may have been missing. Remember, we do not run before we can walk!
Once the two of you have reconnected, the newfound confidence you have found could help explain what it is you want to try next that can open up new territory.
Plan a Fun Date
Breaking out of your routine of being in a dry spell is not as simple as you jumping into bed and forgetting about the rest of your life. You are most likely stuck in a routine in all aspects of your life, but taking the time to try something new to spice up your life outside the bedroom could also work wonders for your sex life.
Plan a fun date with your partner. It could be painting pottery with them, taking them out to a new restaurant, heading out for drinks or disappearing for a weekend getaway something exotic. The opportunities are endless, and when in a new environment, we can feel much more confident. Just remember to bring back that confidence!
Try Something New and Exciting
Once you and your partner have rebuilt the foundations of your relationship, you can start to explore other ways to bring spice into your life. You may have a kink you haven’t felt confident in exploring, or you may have read something somewhere and always been curious. Remember, though, to speak with your partner before the two of you try something new so that the both of you are on the same page and wavelength.
Here are some examples:
Watch porn together: Watching porn together can be extremely erotic. However, it can also help the two of you connect emotionally and sexually as you explore other types of sexuality. For example, if you or your partner is attracted to British MILFs, sites such as Babestation have a range of cam girls for you and your partner to engage with. Watching cam girls can be extremely spicy and exciting for the both of you.
Dress up: This doesn’t mean putting on your best outfit. Instead, it means putting on a fun outfit that could allow you to build a persona and pretend to be someone else. Perhaps you have always fantasised about a certain character in a movie or TV show. If so, and your partner is comfortable with it, they could dress up as that character for you. There are many shops for you to find such outfits from, and cosplaying can be an exciting way for the two of you to explore sexual pleasures.
Invite someone else: Now, before you do this, the both of you need to lay down some rules – especially if you are in a monogamous relationship. For example, you may want to ensure that this is a one-time thing and that neither of you can pursue the third party romantically. Or, if you both feel comfortable, you may want to invite a friend.
Change Your Environment
A change in environment can help you forget about your worries at home and allow you to feel much freer. Ridding any stresses that may be at home can be the best way to end your dry spell. Consider going abroad with friends or your partner. You’ll be surprised at how much more relaxed and different everyone is when they do not have the stresses of everyday life holding them back.
However, a change in environment can also reference the need to have sex anywhere that isn’t your bed. Perhaps you want to head to a fancy hotel for the night or try something a bit riskier. This can add adrenaline to your sex life and make it a night to remember.
It is key to remember that the best of us can encounter a dry spell, and while it can cause low moods and damage our confidence, there is no reason why you cannot get back on the horse and have a spicier sex life than ever before.