The World’s Most Addictive Workout Plan

Andre Agassi, who admitted to doing methWeek One: Fat-Burning Superset Workout


• Dry heave. Ideally, do so while shoplifting greeting cards for no discernible reason.

• Steal a municipal garbage can and try to sell it for scrap.

• When refused, drag can until failure while yelling obscenities at no one in particular. Breathe diaphragmatically and alternate can-dragging hands.


• Drink something that you find in an opened can on the ground in an abandoned lot. Keep abdominals engaged.

• Hurl your garbage can into a river. (Remember: Hurl with your legs, not your back.)

• Alternate sprints and pimp walks alongside river. Cock your neck at a bizarre angle while keeping deltoids engaged.


• Notice a garbage can in the river!

• Dive in to retrieve garbage can.