How To Give A Toast

Wedding season is launching into full gear, which means there will be thousands upon thousands of toasts given in hotel ballrooms and VFW halls around the country. And unfortunately, the vast majority of those toasts will be terrible, because most people have no idea how to give a toast. Not only that, but 74 percent of Americans suffer from glossophobia — the fear of public speaking. So in addition to making toasts that are too long, unfunny, and impossible to follow, toasters are doing so while stammering and flop sweating. But your next toast doesn’t need to be that way. After you read this list of tips we compiled, people will be toasting your toast … or at least not throwing stuff at you.

Mark Twain’s golden rule for toasts was, “No toast … should last longer than 60 seconds.” You’ll most likely exceed the one-minute mark, which is fine, but depending on the occasion, you probably don’t want to speak for more than three or four minutes. All the rules of good public speaking apply (make eye contact, talk slowly, etc.). Practice a few times in front of someone to help you lock down what you want to say and how you want to say it.

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You’re basically assuming the role of an expert on whomever or whatever it is you’re toasting. So act like you know it front to back. The groom? Tell people amusing — but not overly embarrassing — stories about him that most of them don’t know. A holiday? Throw in a fun fact or traditional salutation. People won’t remember your entire speech, so offer them something interesting to take away from it.

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You may be the one with the mic in your hand, but your toast shouldn’t be all about you. For instance, if you’re toasting a buddy in front of a large group of people, you can’t just say, “Hey John, remember the time we spilled paint all over your dad’s rug?” It may make you and John laugh, but that’s not an actual story, and the rest of your audience will just feel annoyed and left out. And unless you make a living doing impressions, you probably don’t want to do any impressions.