How Chivalrous Should You Be?
Some chivalrous gestures will help win her over. Others will send her packing. We’ll remove the guesswork for you.
By Robin Hilmantel
I’m sure Carl (not his real name) thought he was being sweet when he asked, “Can I kiss you?” But I didn’t. I thought it was cheesy as hell.
Unless you’re a “Carl,” you probably know better than to do dumb things like request a woman’s permission before you lay one on her, or toss your blazer over a puddle to shield her stilettos from water. But do you know how other chivalrous moves come off these days — which ones women now consider offensive, and which ones possess the power to (sometimes literally) charm her pants off? You will.
Do: Guide her through the room
Put your hand on the small of her back as you’re walking together at a party or a restaurant and you might as well be George Clooney in her mind. Just make sure to keep your hand a solid four inches above her ass or you risk crossing into skeevy-perv territory.
Don’t: Write her a love letter
Sending her a sappy e-mail about how amazing your third date was might be cute to her after the frist read, but at least one of the five friends she’ll forward it to will convince her that the note means you’re a player or a stalker (or both). So step away from the keyboard.