PFC DIRK VLUG
Stationed in the Philippines during World War II in late 1944, Vlug was ordered to set up a roadblock. Unfortunately, heavily armed enemy tanks ambushed Vlug’s unit. So, Vlug decided to grab a bazooka. And, armed with that bazooka, he charged headlong into a motorcade of five tanks. He killed the first one with his first shot, prompting the second tank’s crew to dismount and try to subdue him at close range. Instead, Vlug popped one soldier with his pistol and frightened the others back to the tank. In kind of a dick move, Vlug then blew up that tank … before taking out tanks numbers three and four.
It gets badasser…:
As for the fifth tank? Vlug nailed it with the final round of ammo he had for the ‘zooka. But instead of just blowing it up, the blast sent the tank over a cliff. Vlug presumably then uttered, “Tanks for the memories!” lit a cigar, and sauntered off to get laid.